Has it already been 3 months since my last baby update? Time is flying and Ben keeps getting bigger, and it’s the most amazing thing to watch and be a part of. For this update, I thought I’d share some thoughts about the first 6 months with a baby.
I’ve been writing down thoughts here and there, so here goes:
- Nothing compares to receiving a baby smile. Seriously. There is nothing like it. When I’m on the receiving end of one of Ben’s smiles, there’s nothing that matches the feeling of joy I experience.
- It’s really hard to leave them. I work full time, and even though we do a bunch of different child care things – in house babysitter, daycare, family, etc. it sucks leaving them, no matter what. I got to be home with Ben over the holidays, and the first day I dropped him off at daycare I cried all over again. Other parents came and went and I was still there saying goodbye. He has amazing days with others, and I know it’s good for him to socialize and have different experiences, it’s just hard.
- Babies are so expensive. If you thought your Target runs were expensive- multiple that times 5.
- Babies are heavy. There was a day last week when my arms were aching. Ben has started doing this thing where when you’re holding him, he likes to jump up and down. It’s like holding a live shake weight. And carrying them around in a car seat. It’s like an art form, but I am the clunky one who hasn’t gotten it down right…I do like a waddle/heaving the carrier. He’s 16 lbs, and the carrier weighs a ton and then he’s all bundled up for winter. I swear it’s like trying to carry 30 lbs around in one hand.
- You will always be slightly late. Getting out the door these days is always interesting. You can’t just grab your keys/wallet/phone and go. Now you have a person to take with you lol. A baby ready takes a long time and chances are, 2 out of 3 times you’ll have to change them before you even leave because of spit up or some other bodily fluid filled incident.
- You will notice babies everywhere. I can honestly say, before having Ben I must have had blinders on. I would go to Target and not notice anything. Now? Now I swear I see only moms/babies.
- Tags/labels on baby clothes and bibs are the dumbest thing ever. Baby clothes are small, very small, why are they including a 4×2 inch label (or multiple labels) on it? It’s itchy for the baby and annoying for the parent to have to remove. I know it’s for marketing purposes, but geez is it annoying.
- Your skin will change after having a baby. File this under things no one ever tells you. Hormones are no joke, and postpartum my skin has been crazy dry. I’m talking like on my face, I feel like a lizard or something because my skin will peel/crack it’s so dry, before having Ben I never had any dry skin like that at all. Now I have to moisturize every night before bed (this sleeping moisturizer is the only one that has actually worked, I got this set for Christmas too and I am loving the other products in that line.)
- Even if your baby sleeps through the night, you won’t anymore. Ben has been sleeping through the night since 7 weeks. I know I am extremely lucky for that. But gone are the days I can sleep through the night. I wake up halfway through to go check on him or go to the bathroom, after being pregnant and waking up ever 5 minutes at night, then you bring home and have to wake up to feed them every few hours, you just get used to it I guess. My husband laughed when I shared this list with him and said this one is totally true for him too, he said he definitely wakes and goes to check on Ben in the middle of the night (and we have a monitor and are like 5 steps away from his bedroom).
- You do not need to worry about getting a nursery ready before the baby arrives. So this one was definitely something I learned, baby nurseries are totally a myth. The baby sleeps in your room in a bassinet for the first few months, and then after that gets moved to a nursery. You want the baby to be close to you not only for feeding, but to reduce the risk of SIDS, also, I just read that the American Academy of Pediatrics’ (AAP) recently went from suggesting a baby sleeps in the same room as parents from 6 months to a year. We had been sleeping in a bassinet until he could start rolling over, then it was into his own room. We had moved just under a month before he arrived, and had virtually nothing ready in his nursery and people kept freaking out “is your nursery ready?” they’d ask, and it would stress me out a little. Even when he came, we didn’t have the crib or anything set up lol. But just recently he’s actually in the room. So as long as you have a place for them to sleep and a changing table situation, I’d say you’re good to go.
- You and your partner will have stupid fights/arguments. You’re both sleep deprived and aren’t really sure what you’re doing, … you will inevitably get into the dumbest fights. I think once we argued over swaddling his arms left or right first? I can’t even remember, I just smile looking back. I love my husband so much, and am just glad we knew we were there for each other and didn’t sweat the small stuff too much.
You find you can talk to other parents for hours. Before having Ben, I never realized how much I could talk to people about something. For real, I could now strike up a conversation with anyone and could tell them about my kid for hours. Yup, I’m that parent now, never thought I’d be, but I am lol. I also love hearing about other peoples’ children. Talk to me about your kids and I’m listening to you for hours!
Mom guilt sucks! I work full time and run a business (this blog). I have guilt that I work too much sometimes, but then on the flip side I want him to experience new things and socialize. It’s just tough. I try to batch work and only work when he’s sleeping or napping so that I’m fully present when he’s awake, but I definitely sometimes feel guilty when I know I shouldn’t. I think it’s just part of being a mom and wanting to do what’s best for Ben.
You will get unsolicited advice. So much advice from others! But secretly I love all the unsolicited advice, I feel like it’s a learning opportunity always. Did you know that xzy product is better than xzy product? Nope, but I do now lol!
- Take all the photos you can. Seriously, I cannot tell you how crazy cool it is to look back in my phone at photos. Things change so quickly- sometimes day to day things change, and it’s neat to have captured a moment or something cute. Fill up your phone, who cares!
You will feel like the worst parent in the world. You will feel like the best parent in the world, know that you are the BEST parent in the world! I will say that knowing what to do and parenting didn’t really come naturally to me. I felt really unprepared at the beginning. You feel this surge of love, but don’t know what to do. Like I had no idea there were so many different types of baby bottles or diapers or swaddles. There’s like 500 options of each. How do you know which ones to use? How do you even know how to diaper and swaddle properly? We took a birthing class, but it didn’t go over all the practical stuff I thought it maybe should have. I read some books (my favorites were Bringing Up Bebe, On Becoming Babywise, and Happiest Baby On The Block)
For Ben’s 6 month photos (the photos you see in this post) were done by the super talented photographer Ren of Studio 29. We went to go take photos outside, and it got super cold. Ben was blowing snot bubbles and spitting up all over the place, of course I hadn’t brought a burp cloth or anything. It was so funny, Nick and I still laugh looking back at the photos remembering what a train wreck it was lol. He’s grown so much, thank you for reading and following along this journey!